This Seemingly Never Ending Struggle

"As I write this post I find myself overcome by depression and anxiety due to fear of what the future holds for my family and myself. I'm diagnosed with PTSD with sleep disturbance (which I believe to be Sleep Terror Disorder), Bipolar, and Anxiety Disorder (NOS). I'm taking Klonopin, Quetiapine, and Lamictal and I still don't feel much better, with the exception that my anger outbursts seem to be more controllable. I've been unemployed for over a year and don't see how I'd be able to hold any type of job. I'd tell the boss to fuck himself the first time he gives me attitude or even looks at me funny. It's a scary and degrading feeling knowing that I can no longer provide for my family on my own. My only hope is getting 100% permanent and total disability from the Department of Veterans Affairs (VA). I've been fighting for my benefits for 3 years now.

As I've been granted service connection (SC) for PTSD by the VA, I'm hoping that getting SC for Bipolar and Anxiety Disorder won't be a problem. If I'm denied, I fear that I may kill myself. I often have thoughts of suicide and its benefits. Sometimes as I'm driving the Autobahn at 120 mph, I get the urge to jerk the steering wheel in either direction. It'd be a quick, painless death at least.

My wife and kids are the only part of life that I have left to hold on to"
Sand Box Vet