Uniform of the Day: DROOL BIB & HOCKEY HELMET

"I've been trying to fish my toast out of the toaster with my fingers and all this has done is burn them several times. Being the genius that I am I decide that I should now use my spring loaded Benchmade knife to do this, this should keep me from getting burned but the chance that I'll electrocute myself has now gone up exponentially. I really like toast and I pretty upset that it's not coming out of the damn machine. This is obviously a Taliban plot to frustrate me and I resolve at that moment to plan an operation to find and destroy these sick individuals that have conspired and acted to foil my toasty happiness.

My team NCOIC MSG Famine commences to walk into the chow hall. The Army now says that I'm supposed to call it a Dining Facility as it's more positive. What the? Anyway here comes MSG Famine who observes me with my knife in the toaster,

"Sir, do you really think that's a great idea"?"
Afghanistan Shrugged